Skip to main content

Don't Leave Your Wife Out

Small group leaders and flock leaders carry a lot of responsibility in their ministry roles. Besides their own walk with the Lord, small group leaders carry responsibility for leading and shepherding their small group members. And flock leaders are responsible for shepherding the small group leaders in their flock and helping them grow as leaders. But for those of you who are married, your first area of ministry and spiritual leadership is with your wife.

But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God. (1 Corinthians 11:3)

I want to concentrate on three areas:

  • Prayer - Pray for your wife and your marriage. Pray with your wife. Have your ears and eyes open for opportunities to take an issue or a trial to prayer. Then take the lead. Be the one to say, "Let's pray about that" (i.e., HBC "Let's pray now" principle). Put your arm around your wife or hold her hand and pray with her, for her and for your marriage.
  • Small Group - Encourage your wife to be in a small group. Make it possible. Get home from work to watch your young children so she can go to a women's small group. Or, if at all possible, be in a small group with her (yes, even if that means you have to step away from your men's small group). This is a very practical week-to-week way of helping your wife focus on her walk with the Lord. You know how much we all need the mutual ministry of small groups to encourage and exhort us in our walk. Don’t leave your wife out of this.
  • Accountability - Ask for and allow yourself to be held accountable in these areas. Model this to your small group. Know the state of the marriages of the men in your small group. Go deeper than "In what ways have I demonstrated love and respect to my wife this week?" Have your small group pray for members' wives by name and for the future spouses of single members.


The best Christian marriages are a threefold cord with husband and wife both passionately pursuing Jesus Christ.

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him--a threefold cord is not quickly broken. (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)

Be the spiritual leader in your marriage. Don’t leave your wife out.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Statement of Repentance

My wife and I have called Harvest Bible Chapel in Chicago our home church for 23+ years. We have seen God do great things in and through Harvest in that time. We have served as small group leaders and coaches and continue to do so. We have been blessed to invest in many couples through newly married small groups. We have led mission trips to help sister churches in Romania, Moldova, and Haiti. We enjoy it all and count it as service to our Lord Jesus. This statement is about my service as an elder at Harvest Bible Chapel. It is a personal statement, not a statement on behalf of anyone else. It is not a statement on behalf of the church. I served as an elder on the larger elder board from 2010 through 2015 (i.e., two consecutive 3-year terms before a mandatory roll-off). I was off the board for the three years between December 2015 and late December 2018. I rejoined the board in late December. Up until a few weeks ago, I counted it a privilege to have served as an elder at Harvest...
7 comments
Read more

One Year Later -- A Look Behind the Mask of James MacDonald

Recently, James MacDonald started a 40-day “devotional” video series leading up to a re-launch into "ministry." He started this series exactly one year to the day that the elders of Harvest Bible Chapel fired him for cause. If you know James MacDonald, you know starting his “devotional” on February 12, 2020 was intentional. If you don’t know James MacDonald, you need to know starting on that date was intentional.  The verse MacDonald used in his February 9 Facebook page teaser post caught my attention : … for a wide door for effective work has opened to me, and there are many adversaries. (1 Corinthians 16:9 ESV) By using this verse and including the second half of the verse, MacDonald hopes to position anyone opposing his return to “ministry” as adversaries. MacDonald regularly portrays himself as under attack or as the victim. He is doing his best to weaponize Scripture here. If you know MacDonald you may share my skepticism. You may share my concern as you see hi...
Post a Comment
Read more

And That's Enough

Friday afternoon I sat on an exam table at my pain management doctor's office as he gave me 31 Botox injections in key spots in my head (including between my eyes which was fun), my neck and my shoulders. It was the latest step to combat chronic headaches that I have now been battling for fifteen months. I should know later today or tomorrow if the shots are helpful for me. The Botox shots follow a rule of three - three days to take effect, three weeks for full efficacy, and the effect typically lasts three months.  For some reason I am more anxious about the results of the Botox shots than other steps we have taken to try to combat these headaches. I say we because my wife, Kim, is right beside me in this whole trial. She is affected as I have had a headache on average more than two out of every three days for the last year and a quarter. Often those headaches are severe enough that I need to take rescue meds and sleep a few hours. When I was at thirteen months I calculated that I...
Post a Comment
Read more